Self preservation or take care of your own damn self, if you can

Harbor across from the Hilton Hotel downtown St. Augustine, this was the view from my balcony. God I will miss Susie my dear friend who died this January. We were best friends since Sophomore year in high school.

This is not what I set out to write about but what the hell, it is what my fingers are typing. When Susie moved here she was so happy. Northern Michigan was not her friend, never had been really and when the economy went to shit she and her hubs had to declare bankruptcy on their jewelry store and they moved to St. Augustine. They had jobs, a trailer, friends and a pool. They were fine.

And they loved Florida.

We saw them when we could and Susie and I  were always on the phone, except when we weren't. She could be prickly and a bitch and I do not always have the patience of Job or whoever the Bible guy is. She got breast cancer around 2013, then a year or so later it metastasized to bone cancer. She was on chemo maintenance for around 6 years. I started noticing the last year she seemed not right. I was not sure if I was correct, if maybe the pain meds were taking a toll, the chemo was taking a toll or just what the fuck was wrong. And at first it was too little to talk about and later I did not know what to say to whom. Her sister-in-law was supposed to visit in October and I thought great, someone else to check.

That visit did not happen. Family problems and shit. When I took mom home in November we stopped and had breakfast with Susie. She seemed tightly wound but okay. She was driving and making sense. Just before Christmas she started telling me she was having problems. It had been over a year since I saw my granddaughter due to all mom's problems so I was not anxious to say ya, I can do this for you. I wanted to see my family.  She started falling down and I talked to her sister-in-law when we were certain she needed medical care. I was not the person on the decision list, I was only her friend of 50 years. Then she told me she had water on the brain. Then it got crazy, because when you are talking to someone that has a messed up brain things do not come out clearly.

Our last conversation was so strange and then they loaded her into the ambulance. And then she died.

January 17,2020. Her birthday was the 15th of January and she saw nothing of her cards and heys on FB.

 It was actually brain cancer. From the breast cancer. That is how it works, the breast cancer cells seem to just roam around and find a new place to settle in some people.

I had to tell her SIL that I was not sure if they would have a easy time finding her stuff as she was really sketchy the last year and I know for a fact could not find things. I told her to put some things in the freezer and who knew if she did. I wore a ring, pink sapphires in a black setting and she just loved it, could not stop talking about it. I said  she could wear it, I never saw it again, it disappeared into the void.

Oh, I forgot to mention the year before her husband  died of lung, liver and brain cancer after a short illness. None of this was easy.

And thinking back how much of what she told me was correct, when did the brain mass really start making her reality suspect? God I miss her.

 And I am so glad she is not going through this current bullshit.

The Casa Monica Hotel in St. Augustine

Rather trashy looking but very comfortable.

Everything on the bed was washable, and that is my number one "gotta have it".  The room itself was okay-especially when you consider the price-expected a bit more than okay. But the location was the best in town and if you are a walker-there is no better place to be. Room was not small but there was only one chair and a couch, so when we ordered room service-what to do? They solved that by bringing two trays. And as there was no chance of eating anywhere in town the Friday after Thanksgiving, we shut up and were grateful for fuel for our bodies. Room service food was not great.

The hotel was fine, but for top dollar prices they were lacking in many ways. Bar was too small, especially when you have weddings, too few staff and the staff that was on duty tended to be cranky.

But the real beauty of the hotel, you are within walking distance of everything downtown. And the restaurant was pretty darn good. The Hunters Platter in the Bar was worth my money and we slept very well.

Odd thing about the hotel, no CNN. Not that I missed Piers.

I just snapped

Friday I was just so antsy I could barely stand myself. And my supervisor was in a foul mood and made me want to smack him. Then he got snappish that my badge has not been turned on at one of the plants. Well, sorry that is his job and obviously he failed. And after I have told you a few times I am not going to harp on it every day. Oh yea, I forgot, he is also Mr. Cut and Paste and send your emails to other people. Nuh uh dude, now very little gets put in writing. Be careful what you wish for.

So I finished up early and called Big Daddy and demanded the exact location of TJMaxx. Retail therapy of the sort were you could touch and see the goods. It was like a dream. I had so much fun and finally got the loaf pan of my dreams for 5.99. What a deal. And BD got new socks. There is something strange about BD's body chemistry and he eats through most metals and socks. Don't know why but it is true.

 I got a couple sweaters to wear to work, thin merino wool. I am thinking to wear these over cotton tee type shirts. Nice tee type shirts. You see, I must carry my outerwear with me wherever I go. So I am lugging my coat and a backpack every step I take. I am thinking I can wear the sweater under a non bulky jacket and be warm enough to get in the building on most days. I will just keep the down coat in the car for emergencies. I also got heavy duty North Face gloves as I have Reynauds and the fingers freezing is not fun.

Next I need to figure out what to wear for our trip to St. Augustine, the temps are in the high 60's and low 70's and should stay that way. I need footwear. I just found out there is a Marshalls around the corner from TJMaxx, how delightful. And they have a fabulous shoe department. That and DSW shoe warehouse should finish me off. It is so nice to go shopping here after my experiences in Shanghai. My next goal is a consignment shop for my wedding attire and I think I am dumping the wool cape from China. We will see.

Sunday Snippets

The Saeco coffee machine is making the most addictive coffee ever. Big Daddy is out of this world with his coffee and I must say I am also quite pleased. I had forgotten how good this coffee tasted.

Punkin Head is all settled in and is in love with Portland. The apartment is fine, the neighborhood is nice and walkable, and he is very happy in his new job and his office. He said he thinks this is the start of the winter rainy season. And he can take the bus to work so that makes him very happy.

It cooled down here, last week it was too muggy and hot and this weekend in the 60's. It will warm back up next week and I need to take advantage of the warm weather to do some outside chores.

I wanted pumpkin bread but somehow we have no loaf pan to bake bread. I was going to order one but I could not push the button. I must have put myself on the no spending diet. I have spent quite a bit lately, so next month I will get the pan. Actually it was quite a large order from William-Sonoma, so it was a bit pricey.

BD made Sammy the Spanky dog's reservation at the Heartbreak Hotel and he gets 2 baths. We picked him up early last time and they owe him a bath. So he will get one when he arrives and one when he leaves. The thing is, Sammy Dog loves a good bath, he will be in doggie heaven. We have our reservations at the Casa Monica, a very beautiful hotel in the heart of St. Augustine. It is a non-smoking hotel so we could not stay there until we were non-smokers.

My order from Amazon has not come in yet, so today I am sending BD to find a Barnes and Noble coupon and I think I will have him get the book Empty Mansions. Looks like a good story. Also The Butler by Wil Haygood.

Next week we will be building pilots vehicles again. The only difference is as for as I know all the parts are good this time. It is sure to be a lively week and I am hopeful the last week of overtime. Will try to post next week.

Sunday Snippets

Gotta love a GTO

Big Daddy for some odd reason runs into a guy he works with, much higher on the food chain, every now and again at Trader Joe's. Today he left them with the advice, "Watch out for Bugger." The guy looked  puzzled while the wife said, "Bugger is our neighbor and he is a terror." The hilarious part of this story is that everyone knows this kid by the name Bugger. Come on, that is just not right.

I am within ounces of my new weight, ounces I tell you. This is not making me happy.

Oh, and Big Daddy agrees, we had scant photos in the wedding album, 2 or 3 of each of us and they were all horrid. When Big Daddy says I don't look that bad, well, I don't look that bad. He said he looks like shit too. That photo guy did us no favor in his couple of pics he took.

We have our reservations started for Thanksgiving in St. Augustine. We will see how this goes. Big Daddy said Delta, and the rest of the airlines, are tightening up the requirements to be a Big Deal, and we will never reach that status again. So we must use up our miles very soon.

We went from 100 degrees to chilly ass 60's overnight. I have to get my winter clothes ready.

There is no picture

That is because the camera is broken. This is the camera that was my Mother's Day present many moons ago. The one that I did not want, need, or ask for. Big Daddy loved it. He played with it for hours and days and weeks. The one time I actually needed a camera at work he pouted when I asked where I could find it.

BD had new glasses made on Monday and it only took 3 hours for progressive lens. And he bargained 100 bucks off the magic flexible frames. We ate at some great restaurants, saw the ocean, and walked for miles. We also did the tacky ghost tour and I must say the ghosts seemed to be on vacation.

Gotta give a rave to Hertz, the navigation system in the car was great. And returning to the airport you just program it to go home, hit the airport and no problems. Loved it. Delta upgraded us on both flights and life was good.

Gotta get ready for lunch. Later.

The sunshine state is BRR cold

Trip to Florida was a hoot. Freezing cold and I am not kidding, lows at night of 24 F, and windy to boot. Should have taken fur and boots. North face jacket and down vest worked well but feet were cold.

St. Augustine is beautiful. Visited the lighthouse and caretaker's home, the oldest schoolhouse and drugstore, and the Catherdral. And shopped and ate and drank. A good time was had by all. You forget how good fresh shrimp is until you eat it again. And southern BBQ, yumm. Did not get to see the forts and it was too cold to visit the island by boat and kids were everywhere. They must do field trips before Christmas and kids are not my favorite when doing historic sites.

TSA was fine at both airports. Could not believe in Detroit did not have to remove my hat or jacket, just open jacket so she could look. No one touched me. Jacksonville TSA were actually friendly, wonder if they are all on meds for the holidays.

Big Daddy arrived home yesterday and is happy, happy. Made breakfast this morning and had real bacon, not that crazy Chinese bacon. Or crappy bacon. Either is appropriate. He had fun at the Shanghai airport waiting to leave. He was people watching and this dad and son came by and the child was screaming. Then the little boy pulled a LInda Blair and puked all over the concourse in front of the gate. Horrendous puking. When he was done the dad picked up the kid and walked away. BD went to the Chinese people at the store across from the gate and jabba jabba, no help. So BD settled in for the show and sure enough the Chinese pretty girls in their short shorts and 4 inch heels came prancing by and slipped and fell in the puke, then the next one on her cell phone came by and tripped over the fallen pukey pile of screaming girls and joined in the vomit pile up. What a way to start your trip. And of course BD did not have the camera for this Kodak moment.

BD has a job interview Monday and then off to New Orleans. Supposed to warm up next week, we will see. Hello Rib Room and Miss Donna.