I saw the famous Chinese UFO I have been hearing about for months. I had just gotten off the phone with Big Daddy telling me his latest flight status. He decided to take the last flight of the day as the last flight of the day always goes. So, as you are going to be delayed all day-take the last flight. You get there the same time and only have to sit around for a few hours instead of all day.
Anyway, I went out on the balcony and lo and behold there was something in the sky. That is unusual. It is rare here to see the sky much less things in it. Once in a while the moon or some clouds but generally no airplanes or stars or anything. There it was, this low pulsating bright white thing, that was not traveling to my eye. It was about 4mils by 6mils to the eye and rotating. Tried to take a picture, I haven't checked to see if it came out yet. It was still there when I went to bed a few hours later. Hmmm.
I do wonder at the coincidence that when the UFO was over the south they shut down the airport and here in Shanghai there were no flights going out. They did not make any announcement but come on, when they don't load the bread trolley until an hour after you were supposed to take off-they knew. I wonder if any flights took off from Pudong-Big Daddy was at the other airport I can't spell and I still do not have a guide to look up the spelling.
Oh, and last time the government said there would be a statement in a week and guess what? No statement. But an article was in the China Daily, my source for all Chinese entertainment.
Wonder if it is their new satellite that may need a booster pack.
Showing posts with label China Daily. Show all posts
Showing posts with label China Daily. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Breaking News: Shanghai
Small Plates:
According to the China Daily you cannot eat penis(es) if you are under 16 or maybe 17, article is hard to follow while you are laughing so hard you are crying and clutching your stomach. This includes every penis from Donkey to Chicken penis. I will pay to see a chicken penis served in any form. Maybe a new book is in order, Who Stole My Penis.
Small Books:
Yesterday I told Big Daddy we were shopping for Bibelots. He inquired as to what they might be. I told him I thought they were cute little pieces of shit to sit around and collect dust. Today Punkin Head told us the history of Bibelots, small books in French that over time came to mean other shit that collects dust. We got ourselves a Bibelot. It is a votive candle holder made of shells.
Small bad fruit:
The have been selling these cactus looking things on the street. Small, round, green on top with a kinda cone shaped body. The top had these convex things that look pretty strange. Finally bought one from a vendor in front of the hotel and took it to the Bell Bar to ask Amay, what the fuck is this?
She said it was very sad. It was lotus fruit. Very sad lotus fruit. Very expensive sad lotus fruit. Dried up. Punkin Head if you dry it you can use it like popcorn. This from the web. Popcorn that would cost a fortune.
Large things:
Which brings us back to donkey penis(es). No I am kidding. I have found the best water in the world. Laurentana from Italy. Comes in big glass bottles. It is heaven. It is also all expired on the date code. When all you can drink is bottled water you become quite an expert on the taste of water. Tried some water recommended in the book "The Man Who Ate Everything" by Jeffery Steingarten. Tried Volvic, nuhuh. This Laurentana that is expired is the best. Negotiating for more expired water as the current supply is expired anyway. And this stuff is not cheap.
Large cabinet:
Big Daddy went and bought the cabinet I picked out for storage. It is beautiful. Now he is mad that all the space is used up already. Did he not notice this shit sitting all over the apartment, including the floor. That's a man for ya. However as my hero he got 2400 yuan off the price.
So things this weekend are not that bad. The apartment is filled with flowers including a "present bouquet" from the flower seller. We found a wonderful amber scented "bottle with sticks" as seen on Oprah for a song. I am happier than I have been for a long time. This place is a bitch to live in. Have to walk to Hong Kong this week. Hate that.
Big Daddy wants Pizza for dinnner after reading Catherine Coulter's "Whiplash", we will see how that works out. Pizza is a first-no penis(es) for toppings-will stick with pepperoni.
Little Automotive News:
Back in the old days we used to pray for someone to screw up the launch before we did. A little bird tells me the latest Nissan launch may answer someone's prayers. I hate to say it because it is so cliched, but also so true, you get what you pay for.
According to the China Daily you cannot eat penis(es) if you are under 16 or maybe 17, article is hard to follow while you are laughing so hard you are crying and clutching your stomach. This includes every penis from Donkey to Chicken penis. I will pay to see a chicken penis served in any form. Maybe a new book is in order, Who Stole My Penis.
Small Books:
Yesterday I told Big Daddy we were shopping for Bibelots. He inquired as to what they might be. I told him I thought they were cute little pieces of shit to sit around and collect dust. Today Punkin Head told us the history of Bibelots, small books in French that over time came to mean other shit that collects dust. We got ourselves a Bibelot. It is a votive candle holder made of shells.
Small bad fruit:
The have been selling these cactus looking things on the street. Small, round, green on top with a kinda cone shaped body. The top had these convex things that look pretty strange. Finally bought one from a vendor in front of the hotel and took it to the Bell Bar to ask Amay, what the fuck is this?
She said it was very sad. It was lotus fruit. Very sad lotus fruit. Very expensive sad lotus fruit. Dried up. Punkin Head if you dry it you can use it like popcorn. This from the web. Popcorn that would cost a fortune.
Large things:
Which brings us back to donkey penis(es). No I am kidding. I have found the best water in the world. Laurentana from Italy. Comes in big glass bottles. It is heaven. It is also all expired on the date code. When all you can drink is bottled water you become quite an expert on the taste of water. Tried some water recommended in the book "The Man Who Ate Everything" by Jeffery Steingarten. Tried Volvic, nuhuh. This Laurentana that is expired is the best. Negotiating for more expired water as the current supply is expired anyway. And this stuff is not cheap.
Large cabinet:
Big Daddy went and bought the cabinet I picked out for storage. It is beautiful. Now he is mad that all the space is used up already. Did he not notice this shit sitting all over the apartment, including the floor. That's a man for ya. However as my hero he got 2400 yuan off the price.
So things this weekend are not that bad. The apartment is filled with flowers including a "present bouquet" from the flower seller. We found a wonderful amber scented "bottle with sticks" as seen on Oprah for a song. I am happier than I have been for a long time. This place is a bitch to live in. Have to walk to Hong Kong this week. Hate that.
Big Daddy wants Pizza for dinnner after reading Catherine Coulter's "Whiplash", we will see how that works out. Pizza is a first-no penis(es) for toppings-will stick with pepperoni.
Little Automotive News:
Back in the old days we used to pray for someone to screw up the launch before we did. A little bird tells me the latest Nissan launch may answer someone's prayers. I hate to say it because it is so cliched, but also so true, you get what you pay for.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
I'm Back
Had to get a new VPN in order to post. Only discovered this when the Internet actually stayed on for one full hour.
The Internet and the cable tv are in a race to see which can go silent more often and for the longest period of time. I learned this only after the day of the meltdown better known as getting the broken tv replaced.
Keep in mind I live in a serviced apartment in a hotel complex.
Started out as every problem does, Big Daddy went out of town. TV in the living room went out. No big deal until I noticed the other tv was on. Called the reception. They sent the Shemp. He fixed it and left. The tv went out again. Repeat the procedure. This went on all night and the next day. Then they quit answering the phone. Then the water in the water bottle unit went out. Only room temp water. Then the kitchen drawer that always breaks, broke.
Big Daddy got home and roared as my voice was now raspy from yelling and crying. The Shemps brought a new tv. It was filthy, must have been stored on the banks of the Yellow River since there was yellow mud on it. The new tv did get a picture so the Shemps left. However, there was no sound.
This is when I had the meltdown. Over 24 hours, 24 Shemps, and 2 tv sets and all I had to show for it was cold water. One of the Shemps brought a water unit. This was before I locked all the Shemps in the kitchen and would not let them leave until they got someone to answer the telephone and talk to me. The Shemps thought it was hilarious. No, they do not speak English. Humor is just universal or my pantomine skills have drastically improved.
Big Daddy had a little confrontation at Marks & Spencer Saturday and 2 "western ladies" were laughing at him. He asked them if they thought that was funny. They told him it is hilarious when it happens to someone else. I guess the gut busting trigger was when Big Daddy asked the clerk to find someone who speaks English and she said, I do.
Chinese Chiclets:
It is hotter than Hades here (the China Daily is accusing the weather people of lying about the temp so the workers do not have to be paid the heat bonus) and the ladies of Shanghai are still wearing nylon stockings. Really bad nylon stockings. No one in the world is wearing nylon stockings in any month of the year but in Shanghai in August these babes are donning nylons with sandles. WTF.
The most inexpensive pedicures in the world can be found in Shanghai in very clean salons. The babes do not get their toes done and still were the open toe shoes, sandles and flip-flops. Gross.
I have been held hostage in taxis 2 times this week, lost 3 times by drivers who have no clue where the streets are. This week tho I was not thrown out of any taxis when they gave up looking. I got out when we hit a traffic light near some places I recognized. Paid close to 80 yuan for their mistakes. Average taxi ride is 12 yuan.
The Ritz Carleton Portman Center is called the Port-a-mon in taxi speak. Hotel Port-a-mon is also acceptable.
When a taxi driver is being hospitable he will turn his ac on high and reach over so the vent is blowing right in your face. All the ac units are moldy for wonderfully pungent smelling experiences. This is why you always carry more tissues than you need. Peeing tissues and sneezing tissues.
New restaurant Las Tapas on Maoming Lu is fabulous. Went twice and great both times. The French restaurant in the Taikang Lu rabbit warren is now Casa 13 (mediterrean)((still can't find spell check function or a dictionary)) cuisine. Pretty good and a great rib eye that tasted of a real wood grilling. The New York Steakhouse is now on the will never go back list. Indifferent service, always out of water/wine you want and frankly they got pissy with Big Daddy about seating. I feel when you spend a fair amount of money fairly often-weekly- they should at least know your name when they tell you to bugger off. Especially since what we requested is exactly what we have had since October of last year. Tipping in China does not guarantee service.
If this Internet keeps going I will post the story of roof next. I have pictures if I can figure out how to post them. Cannot work on learning the
changes to Blogger if the internet does not work.
The Internet and the cable tv are in a race to see which can go silent more often and for the longest period of time. I learned this only after the day of the meltdown better known as getting the broken tv replaced.
Keep in mind I live in a serviced apartment in a hotel complex.
Started out as every problem does, Big Daddy went out of town. TV in the living room went out. No big deal until I noticed the other tv was on. Called the reception. They sent the Shemp. He fixed it and left. The tv went out again. Repeat the procedure. This went on all night and the next day. Then they quit answering the phone. Then the water in the water bottle unit went out. Only room temp water. Then the kitchen drawer that always breaks, broke.
Big Daddy got home and roared as my voice was now raspy from yelling and crying. The Shemps brought a new tv. It was filthy, must have been stored on the banks of the Yellow River since there was yellow mud on it. The new tv did get a picture so the Shemps left. However, there was no sound.
This is when I had the meltdown. Over 24 hours, 24 Shemps, and 2 tv sets and all I had to show for it was cold water. One of the Shemps brought a water unit. This was before I locked all the Shemps in the kitchen and would not let them leave until they got someone to answer the telephone and talk to me. The Shemps thought it was hilarious. No, they do not speak English. Humor is just universal or my pantomine skills have drastically improved.
Big Daddy had a little confrontation at Marks & Spencer Saturday and 2 "western ladies" were laughing at him. He asked them if they thought that was funny. They told him it is hilarious when it happens to someone else. I guess the gut busting trigger was when Big Daddy asked the clerk to find someone who speaks English and she said, I do.
Chinese Chiclets:
It is hotter than Hades here (the China Daily is accusing the weather people of lying about the temp so the workers do not have to be paid the heat bonus) and the ladies of Shanghai are still wearing nylon stockings. Really bad nylon stockings. No one in the world is wearing nylon stockings in any month of the year but in Shanghai in August these babes are donning nylons with sandles. WTF.
The most inexpensive pedicures in the world can be found in Shanghai in very clean salons. The babes do not get their toes done and still were the open toe shoes, sandles and flip-flops. Gross.
I have been held hostage in taxis 2 times this week, lost 3 times by drivers who have no clue where the streets are. This week tho I was not thrown out of any taxis when they gave up looking. I got out when we hit a traffic light near some places I recognized. Paid close to 80 yuan for their mistakes. Average taxi ride is 12 yuan.
The Ritz Carleton Portman Center is called the Port-a-mon in taxi speak. Hotel Port-a-mon is also acceptable.
When a taxi driver is being hospitable he will turn his ac on high and reach over so the vent is blowing right in your face. All the ac units are moldy for wonderfully pungent smelling experiences. This is why you always carry more tissues than you need. Peeing tissues and sneezing tissues.
New restaurant Las Tapas on Maoming Lu is fabulous. Went twice and great both times. The French restaurant in the Taikang Lu rabbit warren is now Casa 13 (mediterrean)((still can't find spell check function or a dictionary)) cuisine. Pretty good and a great rib eye that tasted of a real wood grilling. The New York Steakhouse is now on the will never go back list. Indifferent service, always out of water/wine you want and frankly they got pissy with Big Daddy about seating. I feel when you spend a fair amount of money fairly often-weekly- they should at least know your name when they tell you to bugger off. Especially since what we requested is exactly what we have had since October of last year. Tipping in China does not guarantee service.
If this Internet keeps going I will post the story of roof next. I have pictures if I can figure out how to post them. Cannot work on learning the
changes to Blogger if the internet does not work.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
