Odds and ends

Yes, it was a great pie.

And the bird was good.

And the wreath is up so we don't get run out of the neighborhood.

Big Daddy took Sammy for his cookies this weekend to the City Bark. These are expensive and hand made cookies for this mutt we rescued, a mutt with no gratitude in his heart. He will not sit pretty for me or BD. He knows how he just won't do it. He prefers to prance and bark for us. Well the little ingrate sashays into the store and when the clerk holds up the bag of ultra expensive dog cookies, Sammy the Spanky Dog sits up like he is at the Westminster Show and up for a blue ribbon.

And now a short rant, people that do style blogs should have a sense of style. Or a sense of what is not appropriate, like the ones in my former rants with wrinkled clothes, taddy ball clothes, clothes that should never be seen on a woman much less put on the world wide web as something you should lust for. Today it is about feet and more specifically toes. If you do not know how to properly give yourself a pedicure and you cannot afford a proper professional pedicure---do not put pictures of your ugly ass feet with too long toe nails, crappy polish all over your cuticles and uneven and unshaped toe nails. Do not show nasty feet on the Internet. As a matter of fact these people should invest in socks and never take them off. Ever, even if there their feet rot the socks are better than their ugly ass feet.

Done.

Weekend roundup

I am about to let out a long guarded secret, I am going to be 60 years old on my next birthday. I have been very sensitive about my age for years and then suddenly this year it has become less important. Not so unimportant I am telling people I work with, but I am loosening up a bit. I told Big Daddy I want a great and special birthday even though he and I are the only ones left here in the rusted out city in the rust belt. Since he was worried he had to have something special made for me he showed me some pics for my opinion. On the above I told him no, too fussy and not me. I want something I can wear every day.

Punkin Head asked for pics of the gorgeous hand loomed towels from Joanne, Cup on the Bus blog. She sent these to me and I am touched that someone would send me something so wonderful. I am saving them for Thanksgiving when we take food to my MIL's and I can show off my lovely towels. And yes, I will no doubt hand wash and press them. They are the bee's knees.

Went to get my pedicure yesterday and as always half awake as it a 9 am appointment on a Saturday and she is telling me she has this new product to try on me. And as I am leaving she tells me to report back if it lasts and is okay and doesn't chip. Wait a minute I just paid full price to be a test subject? No, I want OPI at these prices.

Watching the Lions at Wembly Stadium, 21-0 Atlanta at half time, WTF. Late breaking news, Lions won 22-21 on a kick when weeks ago they had no kicker. Must have been the tea.

Made the Trader Joe's pumpkin bread mix with added chopped walnuts. Not too bad, I mean nothing is as good as scratch but for a mix, as Miss Verita would say, not too shabby.

Got a call this morning asking if I knew that the vehicles were leaking. As in water leaking. No, I did not know that. I guess I am the only one and now this is the new big thing. Wet feet.

Big Daddy has a question for Esby, he is one of my long time readers and an owner of a dog. BD is convinced that dogs have been proven to have an internal compass to poop with the poles, they poop north south or south north, aligned with the poles. Can anyone confirm this? This has something to do with that circling that they do when they get ready for bed.

Gotta get my galoshes ready for tomorrow, that would be for inside not outside.

Mr. Ford, goodbye

They said goodbye to Mr. Ford on Saturday. I knew this because as I pulled up to make the turn onto Lakeshore Drive Saturday morning to go to my pedicure appointment the police with all lights aglow swept past followed by a hearse. I thought to myself, well goodbye Mr. Ford. Then I thought, ah shit, this is gonna mess up my trip to town. Then I saw a single Ford SUV following the hearse and one more police car with lights ablaze and that was it. No procession. The convoy was obviously coming from his home and after the car in front of me pulled out there were the two of us following Mr. Ford's procession.

Now the way I was raised, you actually pulled over and allowed the funeral procession to pass unimpeded. Well, there were only 4 cars and we did. Now came the problem, they were going really slow. And it was a double lane divided road. And I had a pedicure appointment at nine. I am sorry, but I had to pass and it made me feel really bad.

And I forgot my special nail polish and had to pick out a new one. OPI's new spring red. It is pretty nice.

Big Daddy made Finnin Haddie for our Saturday dinner and I remembered why once a year is enough with that dish.

I am trying to track down books, currently popular, written by 2 male authors that are mystery novels, I believe at least one is a series. My old and no longer speaking to me friend recommended them and Anne Rice, the writer, also seems to like them. I have tried everything I know and cannot track them down. It is a disappointment.

No longer a newbie

I feel settled in and comfortable at work, I have an idea of what they want and what every person considers their personal "nut". This is hilarious as I guy I used to work with at my old job, and currently work with at this job, just gave notice. He and I do the same job and always have and he was offered a job by the customer. In effect he will be in charge of the shit he used to ship in. I have a feeling my old company will rue the day they let him go and my new company just won't get it. He is younger than I am and still looking to be a valued employee of a good company. My current company views us as expensive and necessary evils, but we will never be valued employees, more like hired guns. Which is fine with me, I don't want to go to the company picnic and Christmas party. I also get insurance through my husband. My colleague wanted more and the customer offered him a job out of the blue. I say good for you and I will be entertained by all the reactions.

My boss believes that managing people is correcting emails. He likes to add additional information that he thinks enhances the content, I just think he is one of those people that must change everything. Whatever. He also takes 3 times longer to order lunch and eat it than anyone else in the world. Hey, as long as I know the rules I am fine with this.

Monday I need to take a grocery sack full of cookies into the materials launch area as those guys are getting real tired of seeing my face asking them for favors. Favors such as "we have sent you in a new iteration of fucked up parts and can we swap them out again"? This of course requires 3 guys and a Hi-lo. WTF.

Got a pedicure this morning, picked up my dress from the dressmaker, and unwrapped my underwear order. Bare Necessities is the best, they carry the best brands at a discount and I have used them for years. Besides the stuff I needed I found a Calvin Klein nightshirt on sale. Now all I need is a bag for the wedding.

It is gonna be back to normal, or back to the normal notch

I am starting to wonder if taking it down a notch did not hurt the process.

I have a second job interview Friday. The person who will be my direct supervisor if I am hired is taking me to lunch. The head dude called and wanted to rush in today and I said, no, no. no. So he suggested a Starbucks meet-up with the potential DS and when he called, DS suggested lunch. So I am calling as normal Nola and he will not be surprised by how I look, except maybe the weight gain. Which can be explained by the quitting smoking.

Pedicure and then the meeting. Please let this work out as I am bored out of my mind. The only thing I do not like about this job is that it is true contract work and I do not get paid for 30 to 40 days after the cut off period. It will be fine after the second month and thank goodness I am not the main breadwinner in this household. I can also take on other contract work as there is no exclusive clause, if I so desire to work that hard.

Then a hair day for Saturday and yard work if the weather cooperates.

The Weekend Snippets

Friday morning was pedicure time and wouldn't you know it we had a snow storm. An unpredicted snow storm. They said a flake or two and I had 4 inches on the front of my car in 90 minutes. Big Daddy cleaned it off before he left and I still had a mess. That reminds of a past snow cleaning. I was in Tennessee on a business trip and our return flight was delayed due to the weather. It was a bad snowstorm and we were flying into Detroit Metro rather late at night. It was extremely cold and all the cars were buried under a massive amount of snow at Airlines Parking. All except mine. Big Daddy had traveled to the lot and scraped the snow off my car. I don't know how he convinced the people he was not parking only scraping but he did. And I was teased for awhile on that one. 

Saturday was hair day and we altered the front a bit so I look less like a crone and friendlier, still blond blond of course. 

We made a new recipe from our Christmas present to ourselves cookbook, Screen Doors and Sweet Tea, pimento cheese. And it is delicious. I cannot wait to eat it today. And we are making lasagna which I have not made in 4 or 5 years so that should be interesting. Saturday we had duck cassoulet and it was divine. 

BD is now hooked on House of Cards, that is such a good show. TV is boring right now, Survivor and Swamp People. Nashville returns next week. 

I just finished The Beach Trees, a book by Karen White and it was pretty good. Murder mystery in the south both Biloxi and New Orleans are featured. Next I am reading Private Berlin by James Patterson. I am ordering A Week in Winter by Maeve Binchy, I did not know there was one left to publish after she died. I just adore her books. 

Next, our music story.

Unpainted Toenails

There will be no picture as I view unpainted toenails unacceptable for public viewing.

I considered drawing a picture but as Leonardo and I seem to have more than 6 degrees of separation that could take weeks.

Shit, first we need to get the latest The Help update out of the way. Punkin Head actually went looking and The Lady inquired for me, I believe a at Barnes & Noble. Nope, it is definitely December for release. As much as I have bitched about this I think Opie should just send me the movie in honor of his daughter, one of the stars of the film. Yea, like that is gonna happen. I would even donate money to his cause, whatever that is, just to get the damn movie.

I have also solved part one of the getting a job mission. I really am wishing I can find something not in automotive. That is a crazy world and I do not think I can do that again, and for probably a lot less money than they used to pay. I am used to sleeping all night and not talking to asshats at 11 PM. Also, since the government gave them some of my tax dollars I feel I have a right to tell them when they are out of line.

So to address part one, I am writing a cookbook. Just because I hate cooking and kitchens and preparing food is not a good reason not to write a book about cooking. I took over Big Daddy's Blog, previously called "Big Daddy Can Cook" now called, The Best Cookbook ever for Really Stupid People. I think it will be a success. I left his old recipes on it, there were only 2, they were good (stolen other people's recipes) and I may want to try them someday. I am currently working on a recipe for making coffee. If you check it out I must say Susan Spicer's recipe for Garlic Soup is the best.

Now, let us address unpainted toenails. These are usually toenails that have rarely if ever been seen by a professional. I do admit I have an odd fascination with toenails. Can't explain that, just do. Toenails should never be shown in public without polish. Professional type polishing. No one wants to look at nasty, dirty, jagged toenails with unkempt cuticles. Cuticle care is as important to pretty feet as perfect polish. Gleaming soft skin, silken cuticles and shiny perfect polished nails, that makes a foot worthy of being seen. Anything less is an affront to good manners. Anyone with a whit of sense can learn to do a proper pedicure, there is no excuse for bare toenails in public.

People without the good sense to polish their toes can wear oxfords and boots. Which of course means men should never be seen with visible toenails unless they are standing in sand. Period. Maybe on a boat, if they learned to properly care for their feet. Or they get regular pedicures, with buffing.

A Question Answered

When we were at the Portman Center this week I bought a paperback titled-101 Stories for Foreigners to Understand Chinese People by Yi S. Ellis with Brian D. Ellis. Excellent easy read for simple problems and questions that pop up here. My biggest question so far was answered in this book. Why in the hell do these Chinese women wear nylons and ugly nylon ankle socks in the hottest months of the year. And they wear them with sandles. So they do not get backaches and headaches. You see, when you sweat the sweat glands in your feet open up-to sweat. So the cold air (this is the mysterious hiding cold air) sneaks into the pores of your feet and travels up the body intact-never sweated out-and voila, you now have a backache. Soon to be followed by a headache. So these ugly, cheap, crappy nylon piece of shit socks are actually medical devices. Who knew.

Went to the US Consulate for my passport request today. There were lots and lots of Chinese people trying to get to the window. Some guy came and grabbed us and took us to the window and said put your passport in. You ever try to reach pass the huddles masses of Chinese people that have made it all the way to the window? So one down and many to go, they will email when the passport is ready. There was one young dude and the passport guy was telling him, this is the second time you lost your passport. Once more and no go dude. You will have to wait until it is up for renewal. I bet this guy can't breathe again without someone making note of it. A US customs guy told Big Daddy what they are worth on the black market and I bet this guy will get the TSA random extra search for the rest of his life.

I do not want to talk about the taxi driver picking his nose, or the girl with plastic butterflys on her toenails or the fact that anyone has toenails long enough to put plastic shit on them. I thought the black girls at Plant Loco had long toenails and they cannot hold a candle to some of these Chinese women. Another Kodak moment and no camera.

I'm Back

Had to get a new VPN in order to post. Only discovered this when the Internet actually stayed on for one full hour.

The Internet and the cable tv are in a race to see which can go silent more often and for the longest period of time. I learned this only after the day of the meltdown better known as getting the broken tv replaced.

Keep in mind I live in a serviced apartment in a hotel complex.

Started out as every problem does, Big Daddy went out of town. TV in the living room went out. No big deal until I noticed the other tv was on. Called the reception. They sent the Shemp. He fixed it and left. The tv went out again. Repeat the procedure. This went on all night and the next day. Then they quit answering the phone. Then the water in the water bottle unit went out. Only room temp water. Then the kitchen drawer that always breaks, broke.

Big Daddy got home and roared as my voice was now raspy from yelling and crying. The Shemps brought a new tv. It was filthy, must have been stored on the banks of the Yellow River since there was yellow mud on it. The new tv did get a picture so the Shemps left. However, there was no sound.

This is when I had the meltdown. Over 24 hours, 24 Shemps, and 2 tv sets and all I had to show for it was cold water. One of the Shemps brought a water unit. This was before I locked all the Shemps in the kitchen and would not let them leave until they got someone to answer the telephone and talk to me. The Shemps thought it was hilarious. No, they do not speak English. Humor is just universal or my pantomine skills have drastically improved.

Big Daddy had a little confrontation at Marks & Spencer Saturday and 2 "western ladies" were laughing at him. He asked them if they thought that was funny. They told him it is hilarious when it happens to someone else. I guess the gut busting trigger was when Big Daddy asked the clerk to find someone who speaks English and she said, I do.

Chinese Chiclets:

It is hotter than Hades here (the China Daily is accusing the weather people of lying about the temp so the workers do not have to be paid the heat bonus) and the ladies of Shanghai are still wearing nylon stockings. Really bad nylon stockings. No one in the world is wearing nylon stockings in any month of the year but in Shanghai in August these babes are donning nylons with sandles. WTF.

The most inexpensive pedicures in the world can be found in Shanghai in very clean salons. The babes do not get their toes done and still were the open toe shoes, sandles and flip-flops. Gross.

I have been held hostage in taxis 2 times this week, lost 3 times by drivers who have no clue where the streets are. This week tho I was not thrown out of any taxis when they gave up looking. I got out when we hit a traffic light near some places I recognized. Paid close to 80 yuan for their mistakes. Average taxi ride is 12 yuan.

The Ritz Carleton Portman Center is called the Port-a-mon in taxi speak. Hotel Port-a-mon is also acceptable.

When a taxi driver is being hospitable he will turn his ac on high and reach over so the vent is blowing right in your face. All the ac units are moldy for wonderfully pungent smelling experiences. This is why you always carry more tissues than you need. Peeing tissues and sneezing tissues.

New restaurant Las Tapas on Maoming Lu is fabulous. Went twice and great both times. The French restaurant in the Taikang Lu rabbit warren is now Casa 13 (mediterrean)((still can't find spell check function or a dictionary)) cuisine. Pretty good and a great rib eye that tasted of a real wood grilling. The New York Steakhouse is now on the will never go back list. Indifferent service, always out of water/wine you want and frankly they got pissy with Big Daddy about seating. I feel when you spend a fair amount of money fairly often-weekly- they should at least know your name when they tell you to bugger off. Especially since what we requested is exactly what we have had since October of last year. Tipping in China does not guarantee service.

If this Internet keeps going I will post the story of roof next. I have pictures if I can figure out how to post them. Cannot work on learning the
changes to Blogger if the internet does not work.

Plant Loco Bambi update

As you can see, the degrading treatment of Bambi continues. The peeps have now inserted a cigarette in poor Bambi and this is just too sad.

Getting my toes done tomorrow and I need to relax because my new, old, and now returning engineer wants to go over last years issues to verify continuous improvement on a dying program when the three headed dog has no money for improvements. And the reason they are in need of improvement is because every change to lower cost was a cluster fuck and caused all the crap we are now dealing with. WTF.

The Martini girl thinks Bambi should at least have an ecigarette. Also in developing news, Bambi is a rescue fawn. Rescued after Christmas by a kind hi-lo driver. We believe this fawn is the spawn of Rudolph.

Toe Problems

I haven't been sleeping well lately, waking up all hours of the night, tossing and turning, hot and cold, AND THEN suddenly in pain. Horrendous pain. Really bad. It was my toe. My big toe. When my toe touched the bed it was hurting.

Now at 2AM this is kinda hard to get your arms around. Although as any normal person would-I touched my toe in the hurt area. Yes indeedy, it hurt. I just love how whenever I am in pain I must recreate the pain. Well, I was successful. From that moment on I was officially having toe pain.

Okay, first I had to get a plan. Plan A is always to ignore pain as I convince myself it is nothing. By the way I am a hypochondriac. When Plan A doesn't work I go to Plan B. Seeing the Toe Lady on Saturday, pedicure every other week is booked forever. OK, Toe Lady will tell me everything is OK, just a little ingrown which she has fixed before. Toe Lady will set me free.

Toe Lady was like, hmmm, don't know, this could be something, hmmmm. Then of course I had to ask Toe Lady if my toe was going to rot away and fall off. She said probably not. THAT IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH. She said if toe still hurts in one week I need to go to the doctor. Now I have to pinch toe every opportunity to gauge the hurt to last time I pinched the toe, will probably cause a huge toe pinching injury and then I will never know. Is the toe OK, did I hurt the toe. And how do you explain this to a doctor, which by the way, is looking at one toe out of ten with no polish. Which is a coral-red. March is the only time of year one can experiment with polish. Next will be pink and then back to summer red for when we get to show off our toes again in rainy April. Unless you are my Martini friend who is currently wearing Three Headed Dog blue on her fingers.

Oh yes, going back to work next week. Think I got the Marvin thing right, still don't have my EPuffer, my mentor Puffette better have that book in hand, and I can't wait too see gregory the worm is still walking and talking.