I have to get Big Daddy Outta here

He is sending me pictures of airlines food. Airlines food is a cardboard box of bread, pickle relish in a foil container and if you are lucky some cherry tomatoes or some jello. Wow, this one had jello. I have never seen anyone eat the jello, including the Chinese people.

The Chinese asshole in the Passport lounge came and sat next to him and removed his shoes and socks and put his feet next to his computer and laughed. That is one person that should be very happy that mama was not on this trip, but ya know I don't think that ass-hat would have done that to me. I have this look that most people understand to mean, I will beat your ass and then I will hurt you. Of course, I have been preaching to BD that he has to be nice, be nice, do not get into with these ignorant m . . .

This is after he had to get the train  tramp, aka Ms. Dolly to make someone get out of his sleeper car seat earlier this week. I cannot describe the nasty things he told me about that trip.

He got the really shitty taxi driver in Shenzhen again, the one that charged 100 RMB for a 12 Rmb ride and refused to give a receipt. He sent me the pictures of the taxi driver, the license plate, the license of the taxi driver and the taxi. He did not send me the picture of the hotel staff trying to get rid of the taxi driver when BD would not pay the inflated bill. He turned one taxi driver in a year ago and he is still on the PRC GPS list. He turned off his iPhone GPS. Shitty taxi driver ran screaming into the night when he saw his picture on the iPhone.

BD was pissed when Daisy Mae, I kid you not, shoved him off onto Susie Q for his meetings, I swear I cannot make this shit up. But he did get the heated Bidet at the fancy Chinese hotel, he just does not have Bidet items to need a heated wash.

It did not help that before he left town we had to have Shemp day. If you do not remember when the bottom guts of our kitchen sink fell out at the other apartment, well it was happening here again. I do not understand why these people adore fixing shit rather than . . . Oh yes, it is because you have to employ a lot of people. So Shemp came to fix the sink pipes and replace all the light bulbs. The ceiling light in the Master bedroom was so dim that we had to light candles to find the bed. BD could not figure out how to get it down to clean it and replace the light bulbs.

Learned a new Chinese word : (as a white person would pronounce it) OH NOCKA CHEEKA, this is said and repeated while making a pyramid with your hands.

I don't have a clue but Shemp brought a real aluminum ladder and pulled the light fixture sideways off the ceiling and replaced the light bulbs. Cleaning is not optional on this one.

Oh yea, it is time for a break from crazy land.

Monday Monday

Comcast got both of my television sets working last night. I watched TV in the family room for the first time since November. What a wonderful world.

Now I just have a broken window and a broken dishwasher. And a yard hold.

Yep, they put the yard on hold at Plant Loco for the little problem. However engineering is fixing everything on their own with double sided tape. Hmmm. Guess they think it is not me this time.

Big Daddy joined China Eastern's frequent flyer program so he can use the lounge. Wonder how that is and if they have sit down toilets or squat holes in the floor. One thing I did notice I never saw alcohol of any kind offered on a domestic flight in China. Maybe they are afraid of the crazy wine. Big Daddy checked on the price of the wine the guy gave me and it is 800 rmb. At 15.00 US to 100 rmb, 120.00 US dollars for weird wine that makes you go crazy. Think I will restart that 50's craze of putting colored water in the very pretty bottle and putting it in the window. But I ain't drinking that shit.

The Traveling Pants or my new pee pee pants

There is a story about the traveling pants. I don't know it. I only know my story of the traveling pants and it is ugly. I am traveling about China with Big Daddy. And in China you wear pants. And in China you have to pee. In China they do not have above ground toilets-you know the kind you sit on. China has these fucking porcelain holes in the floor they call toilets. With foot rests. They are filthy. And the ladies squat. No hand rails, nothing to grab onto. In the floor. And they miss alot-peeing in the hole that is- according to the amount of liquid on the floor. And they do not use soap to wash their hands. They use water. The water you are not allowed to drink. And there are no hand wipes, towels, papers, whatever. I finally got fedded up (a French term) at the last airport and went to the "weak only" stall. It was all fouled up with errant pee pee too, I assuming as they only know how to squat and cannot aim. Or clean up after themselves. and there is no cleaning crew on the "washrooms". Yes, speaking Canadian in China. So now my traveling pants are the ones I wear to and from the airport.

It changes the way you think when you are aware of the fact that most people you look in the eye have pee on their trousers.

At the new accommodation 5 star hotel in Shenzhen it is sucky. There is no manicure/pedicure service. The hair salon is bad-but the hair wash was fantastic. The hair Wash was done in the chair, dropped shampoo and water on drops at a time and the most fantastic head and neck massage ever. Not enough to make up for no other massage allowed-ONLY men are allowed to get massage (including feet). Women are not allowed. So I walked away with a really bad hairdo and aching feet.

It is not safe to go outside and shop. WTF. No shopping in the hotel except for overpriced Chinese shit I cannot find in Shanghai. Vases for 5,000 US, right.

Now we are fucked by Paypal and can't order food any more, so okay no more eating.
And I thought we had found a food source. Some British woman ordered on our account and shut it down. Great.

Big Daddy is now a fan of Dragon Fruit, speckled with seeds so I can't try it, he says it is delicious. So now I will now sign off and see what can possibly follow this fantastic day of disappointment. Oh I almost forgot to mention no smiles today, a couple nasty looks, and no sunshine. If someone could explain why these people are so miserable I would like to know. I get that they are under a communist regime, but since when is it a crime to smile.