Tuesday, May 24, 2016

This is a shameful tale.

So I hear this noise and I walk toward the kitchen and see Zoey the cat jump off the kitchen counter. Now Zoey knows she is not supposed to be up there and I am not so silly as to believe she never gets up there. The next time I walk through she is up there again. Lo and behold there is a huge insect which is black and yellow crawling aroung my kitchen window. It was scary big.

I put the cat in the bedroom because I was afraid she would get hurt if she caught that thing, I Skyped Big Daddy because I was afraid I would get hurt by that thing and watched it crawl up the screen. I opened the window hoping it would stay in that area.

Big Daddy told me to get it with the Hotshot but to be sure the Hotshot worked. As I was looking and checking and wondering if this was a dandy idea the insect crawled down and fell off the window sill into a drinking glass. I grabbed the dirty coffee cup and put it on top. On thinking everything moves slower when cold, I stuck it all in the fridge. Should take a couple hours. Using my logic skills from the past.

Yes, I am ashamed my cat got on the counter but she pointed out the potential problem.

Good Kitty.

Thursday, May 19, 2016

Random Thoughts

Mother's Day flowers from Punkin Head

I went to the doctor today and told him I am depressed. I cannot sleep due to the IBS, hives, dry mouth and other assorted bullshit. So I have new meds, I need to go to an allergist and therapy. Will let you know how this all goes. 

I took my mom to the movies yesterday, we saw Mother's Day-not the worst movie ever made, and we were both amazed that the matinee was only 5 dollars. She told me in Florida it is 9 dollars for seniors. Whoa. But the movie did have the ugliest baby I have ever seen in a movie/TV show. I am talking ugly baby. And the mother of the baby was the tiniest woman ever and she has this huge ugly baby. And this was not a device, just a fact. 

Last weekend we left food on the porch for the postal carrier, it is a huge food pantry effort. Not a problem to leave the food but my mail carrier can barely make it door to door, much less toting these canned goods. This woman drives the mail on a walking route. I feel like telling her if she walked more she could lose that extra 100 pounds she is also carrying around. 

Sammy Dog is getting worse, so bad that sometimes now he does not even fight his pill. He does not seem to be in pain but I am worried. I fear the end is near. 

Well we have a new handy man, Jerry, and he is trying to find and fix the 3 month old leak in the basement. We have repaired, replaced, removed and cemented all we could find. Now we have to jack up the basement floor and check out this other pipe. I am about to pull my hair out on this one. 

And my cat is peeing on the floor next to her litter box. WTF. 

Funny of the month:  I drive some friends to the airport so they can fly to Cancun. The guy starts panicking at the airport about his coffee cup. I thought he was looking for a trash receptacle and I told him I would take care of it. The cup looked like shit.  Over a week later he texts me about this coffee cup, do I have it? Seriously? I told Big Daddy to toss it because what kind of idiot would take a coffee cup to the airport in someone else's car and expect them to protect it and safeguard it for an unknown amount of time? Who is that stupid. And he never asked me to keep it, asshat. 

Monday, May 9, 2016

BSF stands for bu## S##t F####### Bible Thumpers

This Internet is making me crazy.

From the Old Village in China. The Internet stopped me from choosing my own picture.

So my very religious Sister-in-law, the woman who is above all of us because she is special and blessed and righteous and and all out bitch, made my mother cry. Guess why?

A dog shit on the rug in front of the door wall. Black dog shit on a black rug. That it seems might have been peed on once in the recent past. This is not a doggy door, it is a door that someone has to open and take the dog out, like a real dog owner with a leash. And a stupid self possessed dyed blond bitch stepped in the dog shit. And it seems this has never happened before, you know, someone stepping in dog shit.

So the first thing to do when this happens is to scream at your 82 year old mother-in-law that this is all her fault. And you make her cry.

It prolly was your old dog that did this, you should be on top of all this animal circus since you and your husband encouraged the dog buying, you ask mom for money all the time and you are all asshats.

But what really ticks me off is you and your religious bullshit of going to bible study and preaching to prisoners and it is okay to make an old woman cry about less than an inch of dog shit on an old rug.

I do not like pretend christian people who act like asshats. So I guess that is how I feel about BSF, a Bible study group that made my SIL what she is today. .

Monday, May 2, 2016

More snow and cute stuff. Yea, yea, yea.

Yes, I am breaking my own rule.

The Monday after we left Vermont it snowed. I am so thankful I did not have to drive through the Adirondacks in that snow. It was bad enough just being cold with no shoes.

That is not the white snowsuit I got her, mine is still too big. It is so damn hard to buy for babies, especially ones not close.

Well, church Sunday took 1 hour and 40 minutes. I was a little pissed. It was confirmation Sunday and then they did the rail communion and it took forever. I felt bad, we are supposed to be supportive here, but geez, can't we hurry some of this shit up.

Then we went to the Cotswold Cafe at the Edsel and Eleanor Ford estate for lunch. First timers for that one. The fact they serve decent wine helps with the slow service and wacko servers. The food is good just slow. Except for the popovers, not hot and the butter, weird. Big Daddy seems to think I am spoiled by the Irish butter and perhaps I am.

I took my mom's car back after my pedicure. This is about a one hour drive to my brother's house. BD followed me to bring me home. My brother and I are barely speaking but being polite. At some point during the 10 minutes I was inside it was mentioned that my brother thought he was driving me home. I would walk and find an Uber first. My real question is, do these people really think a woman of my age and intelligence would drive across the city without knowing how she was going to get home. Spare me.