Friday, January 30, 2009

Me and Marvin got a second date

Yepper, laid off again next week. Boss man bitching cuz he can't get me on the new corporate cell phone I told him would not work 4 months ago. WTF.

More tomorrow when I am rested.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Safety Issues

Guess what? It us against union rules to pull up a small tote (think plastic milk crate) and check installation issues on the line, actually between 2 tight lines. Oh well, wonder if this engineer is going to get time off. You just do not check someones work within 5 feet of their job standing on a crate. WTF, are these people just nuts. Why not put up a sign-I don't do not think this dude is performing his job? Standing on a blue crate?

18 degrees F here, dog shit is frozen to the porch, Grrdog is bitchy, Ex-mayor wants to seek jobs out of state-no, really, and California and the senate wants to make their own rules for car emissions. Why don't they just make it illegal to buy certain cars? Do we care what they drive in California? Do we think Julia Roberts and George Clooney are in the same buying public that we belong to? Or are all the illegals driving used Prius vehicles? How many heads of lettuce can you fit in a Prius? WTF

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Sunday Newspapers

This is GrrDog and Big Daddy reading the Sunday papers. Doesn't he look sweet. He just got a bath and a blow dry. I had a great blog write-up that somehow disappeared when trying to attach the pictures. Lost the writing and maybe learned how to post pictures.

This next picture is Big Daddy's helpful hint at posting the picture of Grrdog. This is actually Turtle Soup from the Rib Room at the Omni Royal Orleans in New Orleans. I could post more if anyone is interested. The duck livers at NOLA are fabulous.
The automotive connection, the book on the table "Victorine" by Frances Parkinson Keyes tells of the recession in the rice production in Louisiana and how the formerly well off were forced to drive older cars and could not afford to replace them. However there were many purchases of gold slippers in what I would consider a back woods town. Fancy cars, fancy shoes, blind-pigs, jealousy, and stalking. In the 1920's. WTF

Saturday, January 24, 2009

This is a DISASTER

The phone rang at 8AM on a Saturday. This is a bad sign, no one would call me at 8AM on a Saturday unless they believe I need to buy something from them or they have BAD NEWS. It was BAD NEWS. My toe and finger lady cancelled my pedicure. She cut her cornea. WTF. Do I try to do my own toes-try to live two more weeks with these toes-what if I have to find a new toe lady-I just bought new pedi socks last month, I can't waste them by doing my own toes-besides I can't see that well and I am used to perfect polish. Damn. There are days my toes are my only moment of happiness. Everyone wants something from me. Grrdog wants to pee/poop/get a cookie/and most importantly grr at me. Big Daddy expects me to listen to his babble. My boss wants me to talk to him. The Worm, Gregory, wants me to let him lecture me on how smart he is. DAMN. This is a serious dilemma. What if she is permanently out of the toe business? Damn.

Now what do I do, learn to use my new Blackberry so I don't look a fool at work or make the TOE decision? This is just too much for a Saturday morning. Okay, now I feel better, Obama also has to learn how to use a new phone. I won't be the only one fumblin and stumblin in front of the customer. Wonder if he gets his toes done? I saw a picture of him in sandals and you know sandals on a man can be sketchy. Bad cuticles and ragged nails and rough patches and hairy, hairy, toes.

I have made an executive decision. The toes win.

Friday, January 23, 2009


Really just whipped or whupped or rode hard and put away wet. This has been a dreadful week. Working and worrying about Marvin. When I got back to Plant Loco and told them of my Marvin troubles everyone had advice. However the best advice came from my faux union steward who asked if I got my debit card. Of course not, I thought this came after I talked to Marvin. HUGE PROBLEM. Then I spent the next day and a half calling the state unemployment people, finally got someone late Wednesday that told me I was DENIED. How could that be? I have worked for like forever!!! Company filed the papers wrong (which they deny) anyway it got fixed but this took a lot of time and energy for the week.

Next the reorg at the three headed doggie company gave me Gregory as my new customer contact, he hates women, he hates suppliers, he hates his boss and he hates himself. Oh joy. Then I have an ISSUE. The worm then does everything in his power to do nothing and blame me (me being my company). This is one of those guys you would throw your lit cigarette on if he was on fire. Guess what, the worm who could not root cause the damn problem is now laying low. Fie on you worm.

Funny of the day, the plant did not run for about 3 1/2 hours because a chain broke. Normally you would replace the chain and good to go but when you don't pay your chain people, well fuck, they won't give you no more chain. Life is a bitch.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Back to work rant

Whew, don't know if I can survive this frenzy. Got up and dressed and make-up applied, damn I even blew out my hair beautifully. I mean this hair is great.

Got on the phone, land line only as advised, to call Marvin. The great Marvin, who spoken about with the same reverence as the Wizard of Oz. Well, never spoke to ole Marvin as the "circuits are busy, please try again" mantra filled my ear for the hour I was allowed to call Marvin. Fie on Marvin and the state of Michigan. Thanks Jenny for the great service.

After taking care of business (not allowed during Marvin call, all efforts to Marvin only) I started up the company email only to find that HR decided I was off today, either vacation or you just don't get paid---you pick---and call me tomorrow when you return to work to let me know what you decided. WTF.

So....then I called the admin to say, "You know I'm on vacation right" (no clue as HR did not tell the department) and after the holiday bullshit was over I asked the SEMINAL question (highly creative or unique) "You gotta an idea what the plans are for my new company cell phone that I will be needing tomorrow morning at 6AM?" Well guess what, after 3 and 1/2 months of discussing and planning this new corporate policy and canceling my service as corporate will no longer pay for expensed phones, I get to go to work tomorrow with no phone. Please understand, I am a guest in assembly plants. I do not have a desk, or a desk phone, or a computer (Blackberry died last month) nor do I house homing pigeons. In other words, when I leave my house there is absolutely no way to reach me. Just how is the customer supposed to get my attention tomorrow? And God forbid my boss or my own company wants to impart some wisdom or ask me to find out why they are being charged for an air expedite. Don't even talk to me about "We were written up for bad parts", well yea that happens every day and if my pigeon and I would get the coop set up on the roof of my car maybe we could help you. And I will bet you any money that whoever is charge of this project gets promoted.

Oh yes, the best is yet to come, this afternoon on my vacation, I have a 1:30 conference call to discuss everything I am supposed to tell the customer tomorrow. Livin the dream in autoville.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

I am trying to contain myself

I go back to work Monday and to Plant Loco on Tuesday-Martin Luther King day is UAW holiday. Still don't have a work cell phone, last paycheck is wrong, gossip is that I get the wacko for my engineer, and I haven't started my car this month. I love this industry. This is why I make the big bucks, figure it out on the fly and don't fuck up. Thank you God I am good at what I do.

Punkin Head said he read my blog and would sign on as a follower, no evidence of this yet but Punkin Head is busy. He is supplying bread, eggs, and milk to all of Brooklyn for the upcoming deep freeze. Maybe also some wine and cheese which reminds me no hints on new foods from Punkin Head.

Big Daddy had a huge manly day on Friday, fixed the mail slot and the ice maker with only 2 trips to the hardware store. This is a record.

Funny of the day, well reading other blogs-Waiter Rant and Well Done Fillet I remembered some incidents from the past about New Orleans. Great story on Waiter Rant about conversations with our elders I remember the wonderful conversations I had with Miss Verita, Verita Thompson, aka Humphrey Bogart's mistress. Hilarious insights into daily interaction and wonderful memories of Hollywood where shared and appreciated by all. Her best response was when I asked her "Miss Verita, how was Humphrey Bogart?" Her response "Not too shabby." Who still uses the word shabby. Sadly Miss Verita passed and now I need another funny.

Read a story today on the Drudge Report about D.C. having prostitute free zones for the inaugeration. Now how exactly do you have prostitute free zones? Surely they don't mean the prositutes are working for free? Or are they just trying to point the David Vitter type Senators in the right direction? Reminds me of a visit to my favorite place where we went to a very upscale cigar bar on a Wednesday evening. The bar was attached to a famous restaurant and they had just published a cookbook. Now Big Daddy and I collect restaurant cookbooks, so Big Daddy was in heaven with the sample cookbook to read and I had a wine and a cigarette in the beautiful bar so I was reasonably happy. Big Daddy's reading and I am observing. I note the two beautiful women in very expensive clothing and accessories hanging on the every word of two elderly gentlemen. Beautiful women in their 30's, elderly gentlemen discussing WWI and WWII. Get the picture. These women are swooning with interest. I mean swooning. So I look around, and I swear this looked like an upscale version of the movie Pretty Baby. I told Big Daddy, "Dearest, I am the only woman in this place that is not a hooker." He, still reading the cookbook, says something along the lines of yea, right . . . they have a different shrimp remoulade recipe than I use. I continue to peruse the crowd and continue making hooker comments, like "asshole, I am serious this is a hooker haven and they think I am the loser hooker in the joint." Big Daddy finally finishes the cookbook looks around and says "Geez, you're right all these women are hookers. Want another wine?" WTF

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Big Daddy's at it again.

Forgot to post the funniest thing I heard this week. Big Daddy once again was in deep shit with the US Customs officials.

Big Daddy frequently goes to Canada for business meetings. Big Daddy frequently pisses off US and sometimes Canadian Customs officials. The frequency of the infractions is always a mystery as Big Daddy has never tried to do anything wrong, he is just a victim of "I'm just a regular guy trying to do my job in a crazy society" syndrome.

As you may recall, Mr. RV sent us a "poticia" as he knows we like this pastry treat. Well as Big Daddy and I are trying to lose/maintain/not get any fatter/and keep our figures we only allow ourselves a certain amount of highly caloric foods. Normal conversation involves who is to take the remainder of anything into to work. We all know I am laid off so Big Daddy was in charge of taking the remaining tasty morsels to work so that we (the broke people) won't be forced to spend money on new clothes.

Anyway, Big Daddy, at the border answers the questions and is asked to LOWER YOUR REAR WINDOW. This means put the rear passenger glass down so that the Customs official can see what you are smuggling into either country. Well Mr. Customs spotted a foiled wrapped brick item on the second row seat. Horrors. He asked Big Daddy to step out of the vehicle. Then he and Big Daddy-right in line at the Customs booth-discussed desserts. After the Customs official corrected Big Daddy's pronunciation of the dessert he unwrapped the foil covered brick and said it smelled delicious. WTF. Bet the Customs official who made Big Daddy take his socks off one time did not have the same aromatic delight.

Nothing to say

There is nothing to say. Zip, zero, nil, nada, nuttin.

Only thing I found hilarious was seeing LA Senator David Vitter on television talking about Hillary Clinton. I now understand why there are prostitutes in Louisiana. Some people just gotta pay.

Maybe I should keep track of the NYT crossword success.
Monday-on target only 2 passes thru, about 16 minutes.
Wednesday-2 googles, finished, on target.

NO funny to me today, however I heard Plant Loco suppliers are shipping this week. Will wait and see on next week start-up.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009


I am now officially going crazy from boredom. There is nothing to do, no money to spend, it is way too cold to even think about going outside just to do something that would involve spending money like starting the car to slide around on icy streets.

I did speak to someone from Plant Loco yesterday and the pre-lim people did come back to work this week. Still everyone wonders if the plant really will come back up next week. Solid reasons not to run, Monday is MKL day-a paid UAW holiday, and Tuesday the inauguration. Lots of people talking about going to DC and the rest will want to watch on TV. So with 2 production days lost why pay holiday pay and part-timers? Cuz it is the Loco way.

Read today, comments on Bush speech regarding Katrina. Don't want to bad-mouth people but really the same people who think the auto industry should go down the tubes are still bitching about not getting more government help how many years later? What makes living in a hurricane target zone make people more deserving than working in an industry where our own congress sold us out for a few pieces of silver. New Orleans was not outsourced, not allowed to sell Daiquiris freely overseas, not forced to compete with Asian krewes on building floats in third world countries for pennies. Mistakes are made every day and grownups try to fix things instead of just whining and complaining about how they need more help. Try living in Detroit, you think you are the only city with a pothole problem. And at least our prosecutor put our Mayor in jail.

Now I need to remember something funny to force my Psyche out of the angry mode. Still thinking. Okay, years ago I got into my sister-in-laws new Lincoln and saw a sticky note on the front of the IP. I'm thinking WTF is a danger and why are we in the car. Is a gauge broken, a wire shorting out, brakes defective? Asked SIL, "er what is the danger sticky note for?" She told me in all seriousness, "So I remember driving a car is a very dangerous thing." Well that made me feel sooo much better.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Sunday Snippets

Nothing new here in the rust belt, so I will comment on a few items I heard and read about.

Germany: Metal earring can freeze your flesh off. So when did this become news to anyone in the midwest? Is this the first time Germany got cold or did they just start wearing earrings? Necklaces also get very cold if you don't wear a scarf.

Mitch Albom in the SI article "code word" SMUG. Now Mitch and I don't agree on much but I loved the word smug. All of the people that needed all of the help that took all of the handouts. . . and defended their need and defended their tax incentives and defended their choice to live in places where shit happens very often. Fie on you.

Ina Garten, The Barefoot Contessa, "try to pick a ripe tomato" WTF and show me your toes.

The Charmin toilet tissue ad, at least I hope it is toilet tissue, currently running on television. Pieces left behind. Can we explore this? Since when, who knew, and when was the last time this came up in conversation? The only time I saw toilet paper left behind it was not "a piece" it was about a foot and a half hanging out the back of a guys pants. When we (yes there were witnesses)spotted the offending trail of paper we asked "Dude wasup with the shit hanging on your ass." He picked it off and threw it on the ground. We are not talking sanitation here we are talking pieces, this was a hunk. Or a chunk. Get it right Charmin. I for one have never had a piece of toilet paper stuck up my ass.

I want to end with Rex Parker. He watches QVC. I love QVC. Got some nice stuff from there at a very good price. Dennis Basso to name one and I always get both compliments and guffaws. Compliments on the stuff and guffaws that anyone would watch QVC. Watching TV shopping is hilarious. The best is Pamela McCoy on ShopNBC, but I will tell you I have purchased a few things from her line and they are great. Big Daddy's favorite is the latino channel where 9 out of 10 times they are selling underwear for women. If not underwear it is computers. They email in their underwear. Gotta love it.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Snow Fun and Games

First the bad news, I did not, could not finish the NYT crossword puzzle today. Really did not even get a start. I finished the last 5 without help and I thought I was on a roll. HA

As promised I had a pedicure mental health day, had to slog thru the snow in unprotected flip-flops as I couldn't find my new pedi-socks. Grr dog unhappy as an inch or two of snow comes up to his elbows. Big Daddy is happy as he HAS A MANLY JOB, brushing snow off the vehicles.

We got a present today. Mr. RV (my mom's beau) sent us a "poticia". I don't know how to spell that but it is a pastry made with dough rolled very thin and filled with nuts and filling and rolled into a log. I remember as a child my grandmother and great aunts gathering to make this delight, they spent all day cooking and the fabulous treat probably reflected their affection in getting together and cooking and talking. Shared food is a wonderful thing. Thank you Mr. RV.

Friday, January 9, 2009

Friday Funk

"This is bad" to quote Miss Donna. Now we are both home together with no job today. I of course in day 5 of lay-off, Big Daddy on first day of we only work 4 days a week now. Ya know we got a lot of together time since December 19 and this is not a good think for 2 people used to working a lot of hours. Bad habits are forming. Getting up late, Internet addiction, trying to beat stupid computer games and the worst of all documenting bathroom habits. Mine, his and Grr dog's. This has gotta stop.

Things learned:

Sunrise is still just before 8AM
The longer the blog comments the stupider the replies. Consistently.
Computer games are stupid and not that different from each other.
Bathroom habits are an anomaly: Random House 1. A deviation from the common rule, type or form. 2. Someone or something abnormal,incongruous or inconsistent.

Think about bathroom habits. I was taught the common rule, Number 1, was that we pretended this habit did not exist. We did not discuss this, that room was for hand washing only. The can of Glade was there only to provide sales to the maker of the Glade product. But is not it abnormal, Number 2, that we build rooms that we know we are going to use to rid ourselves of all the food we eat in our homes. We also have these rooms in almost every form of public building. Poop rooms. Sometimes also used for peepee. P and P rooms. We don't call them that. We call them bathrooms (ok if all you do is bathe and another subject entirely) restrooms (who can rest with all the pooping and peeing going on) and Ladies rooms. Which asks the questions what do Ladies do in Ladies rooms and why are there no Gentlemens rooms. Then as I am bi-lingual we also have washrooms, loos and banyos. Now I understand the washing-see above-but looing? And at least my Mexican amigos look at the floor when asked for a banyo. They seem to know this is the peepee and poop area.

On to the Grr Dog, we take him outside to peepee and poop (tho usually with a dog we call it poopie), we watch and we let others watch. We discuss it, "Did you see that poopie, it is loose, how do we bag loose poopie? Then we put the poopie in a plastic baggie, preferably ziplock, to save it for future generations in land fills.

Did you notice Random House Dictionary has Number 1 and Number 2? WTF

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Unemployment Success

Big Daddy got me up at 3AM as promised to fill out the forms the state requires for unemployment compensation. Every time I type the word unemployment it seems stranger and stranger. Seems like a silly word for being told to stay home a few weeks. I can see it they said Hit the road Jack-just don't come back no mo. Anyway site didn't crash, they are sending me a goody basket and debit card, and I have appointment to call Marvin. Marvin is famous around the assembly plants. Most special memory is when someone walks up to you (while you are on the phone outside doing business-exactly where you are supposed to be) and they sit down on a caution railing and say excuse me you must leave this work area I HAVE TO CALL MARVIN. Alrighty.

Marvin apparently also tries to trick you. Can't tell you how many times I have heard if Marvin doesn't say goodbye you are fucked. Oh yea, cracked me up today the paper said unemployment department is hiring people due to all the unemployment. Always a silver lining. Also there are certain circumstances when you have to post a resume in the TALENT POOL. Don't you think if we were all that talented we wouldn't be unemployed. And why not everyone? Let the HR people cherry-pick all the talent. Think of the delight in finding someone who can spell, or better yet, the confirmation that the people you hire are okay cuz no one can spell. Fairness in unemployment.

Only funny today came from the paper, an article on how smart Ford was to get TATA Motors to buy Jag and Land Rover. Every time I hear TATA I remember the line from the movie An Officer And A Gentleman, where the guy says "did you see those TATAs". Does that mean TATA got a booby prize from Ford?

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Unemployment sight crashing

This is great, almost everyone I know is filing for unemployment benefits in a state that has probably the highest filing for the month and the site is crashing. At what moment did 2penny Jenny and her minions not think this was not going to happen? Big Daddy says we have to get up at 4AM and try then. Sounds like a plan.

Funny is hard today. However I do remember once when a very arrogant Area Manager was riding around on his cart before the 9:15 in his pristine white shirt and threw a cup of coffee into the gondola. Coffee cup hit the side of the gondola and came back at him. Brought a smile to a few faces.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Lay Off day 2

Alrighty, it only took me 30 minutes to figure out how to post the second post. Kinda redundant but at this point I am grateful for something to do even overusing the word post.

Spent the morning reading Internet news-and posts (my new favorite word) about Jerry Mosingo and the meltdown at Cadence Innovations along with the ongoing circus of the David Stockman trial. Feel sorry for Jerry but gee whiz those people put out some crappy parts for years. Obviously could not get a handle on the quality and made very little effort I saw to really understand the problem. I watched this dog and pony show every day for months and did not see any Cadence upper management people on the floor of the assembly plant verifying the mess they kept shipping into the customer.

And why all the talk about the GM lawsuit to get their tools back, everyone in town knew these tools were being pulled including all the other tools they have for other programs. Every company that allegedly bought the business and tried to ship shit did, was, and will go under.

OK now for the funny of the day, read California wants to tax big screen TV's as they are energy hogs, we are going to digital TV, we all need a converter box (my mother has not been able to set her thermostat in 20 years) or a new TV-putting the old TV in a land fill-and most new TV's are BIG. WTF

Monday, January 5, 2009

Detroit Automotive Meltdown

Detroit Automotive Meltdown
Oh this is fun. My first post and I have not a clue what I am doing. Not much to say about automotive as there is very little automotive business today. Heard Channel 7 news was at Visteon today asking how workers felt about the pay cuts. One would assume a pay cut is better than no job at all. Traffic was light in the Motor City, well what do you expect when most of the people are layed-off and can sleep in. New information to me-you cannot call MARVIN until your third week of lay-off so no reason to get up and call in for your check.

Thinking back on the job and people I will never see again. Plant loco will never be the same, reorg coming if they ever run again. Talent is gone and the people left will be trying to learn new jobs and a new structure on the fly while the line is running. I sure hope someone has a damn good plan. And I pray the arrogant assholes think that maybe they are part of the problem and change their ways before we are all out of job. I am talking about middle management, I am pretty sure the guys at the top know this or do not care either way.

Personal plan is to spend no money in January unless I absolutely have to. Of course I had to get my hair done Saturday. This is in case I get a call for a job while I am laid off, which of course one has to accept if one is honest about having no work. Now I have to justify getting a pedicure next Saturday as in January (or in any job interview not involving pole dancing) one rarely shows ones toes. This will go under mental health improvement and de-stressing as I have been very stressed for last couple of months.

Every day I want to post something funny, funny to me anyway, today one phrase keeps running thru my mind " 6 year old will fuck you up for a Ho-Ho". Comment was made while discussing how the constant changing of start and stop times at Plant loco kept parents from making arrangements for child care and after work activities. Parents cannot know if dinner, doctor appointments, softball or even day-care can be planned in advance on a daily basis. So if Johnny gets picked up early, about the time snacks are ready-watch out. Of course the guy saying this was not the sharpest but he did get the point of the problem, when people are working at the whim of others who do not express any care for the plight of the workers these slights are taken seriously. And next is the expressed position that this is why the UAW is a necessity-which by the way did nothing to help in this situation. WTF