Friday, December 23, 2011

Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair

One time when life was good Big Daddy sang me the entire score for movies. Yes, that was before he quit drinking. South Pacific and Oklahoma were his favorites. When he gave up drinking he seems to have given up singing.

Today I almost sang the lyrics from my unpublished musical "Watch out for the cement on the way off the Balcony". It is a Barbara Streisand, spelling please, type number, really huge and a lot of brass backing up the vocals.

If he survives it would be followed up with Shes Gone , by Hall and Oates. 

There are never any problems according to Big Daddy.

Because you know this is all my fault, I did not communicate the problems properly.

We have had a "sign language" since shit went down the toilet. Picture yourself standing with you arms up at your sides with your elbows bent. Kind of a W if you include your head in the picture. Then shake your hands right and left as if you are going mad. That is the signal that I am at my maximum for bullshit.

The hand signal also means, I am done, do not cross this line, do not proceed forward.

So as Big Daddy just does not get it, let me put it in writing, read it and weep sweetest. Because we are no longer in conversation mode.

When I tell you the worst piece of shit washer/dryer unit in Shanghai does not work properly, it means this machine does not work. It does not mean that the few times you half-ass use it and don't think the soapsuds on the floor are a big deal, it is not a big deal. It does not mean that when you half -ass do laundry it is okay, because you refuse to listen when I say I have to rewash the clothes 3 or 4 times after you leave on your travels.

And yes, I understand that you have never heard me complain about this issue. I am convinced you need your ears cleaned on the streets by the ear cleaning people.

So, yes Shemp came up tonight after my screaming fit and agreed the unit needs something, who knows what that fix may be. This is one of those things you just wait and see. Shemp had quite a bit to say, however it was all in Chinese.

Stuff I have not mentioned recently:

When we got home last night the key cards to the apartment where shut off again.

The butter at the hotel is no longer packets of  New Zealand butter, it is now "really yellow" in a flower shape, I think Chinese butter. I do not eat Chinese dairy products, that is just asking for problems. Remember this when I am on the IV Drip at the doctor's office next time.

A doctor called me on the way home, he was doing follow-up as I am a seriously ill patient (thankfully I did not know this) and the big question is when do I go back to the states. Since my insurance is lousy there I do not think that makes a dent in the big picture.

The best of the best, of course is the little problem of the escalator not working at the train station in Ning Hai, you have to carry your bags up and down 3 sets of  steep marble stairs. I bitched that the suppliers should come help us with the bags, and guess what, they did. They came and got BD's bags. I have noticed that BD is the hero and I am the concubine wanna-be trailing behind. The thing that pisses me off is BD just leaves me behind to struggle on my own.

If, and that is a big if, I ever travel with Mr. Important again I think I will just sit on my bags and wait and see if the asshole notices I am not in the car.


  1. I hate having a washing machine that thinks its smarter than me. I am fortunate that I rarely travel. I do have to get out in the cold and dark this morning to investigate an alarm system and hot water heater for my renters. They complained yesterday about ice and come to find out they were parking next door on someone else's property, parking on the one spot on their 'for sale' where water collects at a drain system that was most likely frozen. They also wanted me to put ice melt on the ice where a low spot in the parking lot collects water. Excuse me, it doesn't drain there except eventually through the dirt and by normal evaporation, just don't walk on the ice.

  2. I am thinking you really do need to get out of that fucking place with its shitty equipment and shemps and fucked up railways and lousy food.

  3. BD is working on it but I may not survive!

  4. The blogger system appears to have Anonymous'd you.

  5. Fuck anonymous, there are always wacko's out there.

    And remember, Santa sees you when you are sleeping and knows when you are awake.

    Some people just beg for coal in their stocking.